Breaking Out of the Cocoon

There is a beautiful story about a caterpillar that lived much of its life believing that it had come into being only to eat and sleep and do what the rest of the caterpillars did. However it was unhappy. Somehow it sensed that its life had another dimension not yet experienced.

One day, driven by a strange longing, it decided to become still and silent. It hung from the branch of a tree, weaving a cocoon around itself. Inside the cocoon, although constrained and uncomfortable, it waited, sensing and aware. Its patience bore fruit, for when the cocoon burst open, it was no longer the lowly worm that went in, but a beautiful, resplendent, winged butterfly which dazzled the sky. It soared and flew, no longer limited to its worm-like existence, but free and unbounded. The caterpillar had been transformed into a thing of air and lightness, magic and beauty.

Once the transformation had taken place, it was impossible for the butterfly to return to being a worm. In the cocoon, the caterpillar had become one with its inner being and in this union it reached its ultimate nature. What happened in the cocoon can be described as yoga. Yoga is the path toward being boundless. Yoga transforms and liberates us, human beings, so that we can reach this unbounded state. We, unlike animals, are not merely existing. We are becoming. To evolve as a human being is to become aware of our limitations; to strive, with intense passion, toward the transcendence for which we all have the potential. The Earth, along with everything else, has been changing since its birth and it will continue to change along with everything else. It is the flexible, strong mind of a dedicated yogi/yogini that will have the humility to let go of the past when appropriate, move forward when necessary and accept the bell of change when it tolls.

Yoga means to unite. Its translation is "to come together and make whole." It asserts that everything and everyone is connected and that there is no separation between heaven and earth, matter and consciousness, mind and body, male and female or you and I. Yoga recognizes that we are all one, all divine. If it is understood that there is no separation between the mind and body, then everything you think, feel or experience will have an effect on your cellular tissue. Our bodies remember everything, and our health is often a reflection of our attitudes and perspectives. Negative or shadow emotions like rage, fear, unresolved grief and jealousy manifest as tension when repressed. Tension, stress and anxiety affect the immune, hormonal and neurological systems and can leave us vulnerable to disease, illness and even depression. When we don't feel well, body or mind, we can more easily withdraw, get reactive and judgmental; all qualities that separate us from ourselves and from each other. It is through yoga, spiritual practice and emotional processing skills that we are provided tools to help us understand and embrace our circumstances, emotions and life in a more holistic way.

Understanding our life's journey, its spiritual significance, and shifting our perceptions can move the physical and emotional tension and allow healing, insight and transcendence to occur. Every time we practice yoga, moving our body and synchronizing these movements with our breath, tension releases. Releasing the tension begins the process that allows us to feel and connect to our vulnerability. Vulnerability is what opens us to surrender, and it is only through this level of availability that we can truly know one other and God.

Twenty years of practicing yoga has taught me God is truth and love and He exists in every moment, both dark and light. His essence is in each experience and in all beings equally. Yoga has taught me that we are in a conscious body to learn what love is, not romantic love, although that may be part of our learning, but God-love, which is inclusive and infinite. In order to truly understand what this "love" is, part of the challenge of being human is we will also have to experience and explore its opposite; what love is not. This process could take lifetimes. To truly understand the light, we must also understand the power and mystery of the shadow. Yoga has taught me to embrace the shadow parts of myself—the ugly, shameful, scary and often repressed aspects—because without the wisdom the shadow provides, I cannot truly understand the power of someone else’s light, the depths of their beauty, nor their capacity for empathy. I cannot know, love or honor all parts of another unless I know, love and honor all parts of me.

We are all in our own processes of transformation in order to learn about this God-love which requires release and surrender. Some of us are more deeply imbedded in this process than others. I, for one, am in deep. I am in a space where I find myself having to go back into my past and re-release things I thought had already been long gone. To redefine my process from a wiser state, yet honor the person I was at that time. Offering forgiveness to myself and to others for decisions made and the reasoning that was oh-so-good at the time….. their lingering effects were unknown….as was the way in which they would become entangled in the fabric of my soul from that point forward….and then to now have to remove the knots all these years later so that space can be created to grieve….to allow….to hurt…to feel….and then to heal once and for all.  I find myself doing things I would never in a million years think I would do. I am on my own journey and it is a beautiful, wonderful, mess that beckons to me, the promise of becoming the lotus flower. I am letting go of logic and relying more on my sacred intuition and I am embracing it for the first time….standing in it…owning it….and becoming more empowered. I am letting go of our cultural ‘shoulds’ and existing from a space where there is an audience of ONE. I am redefining what love is—my self-love and my capability TO love. I am redefining the love I am willing to give to others and how I receive love from others. I continue to learn to live from my heart space and see each other soul to soul.

Yoga teaches us that everything that happens to us in this life happens perfectly and synergistically in order for our soul to transform and understand this level of God-love. Everyone has karma to burn, lessons to learn, and each one of us will walk some challenging and funky and dark paths at times, but these moments will also be the divine catalysts providing great insight, healing and wisdom.

Many I know are traveling this exact path alongside me and with me. We are finding ourselves in this exact spot…a spot of great awakening and the need to be still and silent. It is a spot of allowing ourselves to take ownership of what is stored, choices we have made, acknowledging our unworkable patterns, waking up things deeply buried, and releasing the experiences stored within our biology. This sacred spot demands us to delve deeper into our psyche, our intuition, and exist from our soul. We are taken back to a raw state where we are vulnerable, broken, twisted, and beautiful. Beautiful in the mess we created. Beautiful in the way we move through our own shit in order to be better, so we can become great, and to release the things that hold us back from our true brilliance once and for all.

It is about each of us finding sacred souls who are willing to come alongside us and say, “We can do this together. I GET you. I GOT you.” They offer us love and support without judgment. They challenge us to dig deeper and redefine what once was into something greater so we can evolve. They hold our hand while we wait, impatiently patient, for God to guide us and our hearts to become more like His. They help us remain on the path; our True North. They hold us accountable. They ASK rather than fix. They understand the deconstruction and reconstruction we are stepping into. They are excited to see the end result in us and themselves for they are digging in too.

To those who are these sacred souls to me….THANK YOU.  Thank you for loving me in my mess and I am honored and blessed to have you in my life! I love you wildly individually and collectively. You ARE my TRIBE.

For those on a similar path, find your sacred soul and don’t be surprised if is not who you think it should be. Be open. Be authentic. Say you are WHERE you are. Own it. Dig into it. And oh my gosh…don’t be afraid to break out of the cocoon. 

The light in me honors and acknowledges the light in you. We are one. Namaste.

Onward and upward as always….