My Yoga Journey

When I first found yoga, I was in a life situation that demanded I get out of my head and into the silence of my own heart so that I could hear God's voice and direction. This yoga class was everything I should have hated: slow moving, silent, 75-minutes to cover THREE very basic postures (staff, tree, and table top), and it took 8 weeks to build the sun salutations.  I was used to going mock 2 with my hair on fire. Even with all this, I fell in love with my yoga class, for it was the one class where I wasn't judged on how good I performed, or if I looked the part, or anything. I was allowed to be, to breathe, and to receive, instead of "do." I truly fell in love.  It may have been the first time IN MY ENTIRE LIFE I actually exhaled.

Like any new relationship, I had to have my yoga wherever I went.  I couldn't afford to continue yoga classes, however I instinctively did yoga on my own. I was working on my yoga relationship and reaping the benefits. I was thirsty for yoga knowledge and techniques.  I read anything I could get my hands on. This relationship supported me through many bad life situations.  It changed me in so many ways;  changes that lead to stepping away from a bad situation with someone I loved, to making new friendship choices, to viewing 'success' as a place in my heart and not large numbers in my bank account, to viewing life in simple pleasures and not huge accomplishments, to enjoying rest, to leaving a path of working in a field I enjoyed  toward the path of becoming a full-time yoga mom.

They say that love ripens over time, and I gotta tell you, it really is true. Love has a way of changing our world in more ways than we could ever imagine. My relationship with yoga has continued to grow deeper over the last 14 years because I got to know more about each aspect of myself through the poses, the sequencing, the history, and the philosophy. I could easily spend every waking moment with my yoga-love, and still learn more. The relationship that I have with yoga at this point is so much deeper than when I was in the 'honeymoon' period, and I was so fulfilled.

After the first 4 years of teaching almost every day, blended with a devoted practice every day, I found myself - gasp! - sometimes kinda sick of yoga. I never could admit it; who can admit that they don't want to be with their yoga? Yet I longed for a conversation about something else - even taxes would be more appealing. So, after these first 4 years of teaching constantly, I started to wonder what else was out in the world.  It was around that time that amazing teachers started to cross my path, to bring new insights into my "love" and help me grow even deeper in love with yoga, myself and ultimately God.

This bliss has continued for years. And every few years I still get that phase where I don't like yoga. I want a break. Can I break up with yoga? What I've learned is that I get to give myself some space, without breaking up. I get to take a spinning class, or I get to sit on the couch and watch a movie instead of be on my mat. I get to walk 22 miles with some friends and laugh until my belly hurts. I get take road trips with my children and my friends. I get to spend even more time in conversation with God (By the way, my goal is one coninual, non-stop conversation with God). By giving myself this space, it always brings me back to my yoga with a renewed sense of appreciation and value.

Yoga has taught me so much about relationships. For one, a really, really good relationship is one that comes from the gift of time, and during that time, you may not like your beloved. Also, like deep relationships, I now see more inside my "love" than on the outside. It has taught me that I can love someone in my life, and not like them today, but not stop loving them. It has taught me that I can love my own self, while not liking certain behaviors in the moment, and not stop loving myself. It has taught me to seek God in each and every moment for without that I will never feel whole, complete, and content

My devotion to God and my yoga are ones that won't ever stop.  What I used to do on my mat 14 years. 8 years, even 3 years ago is different than what I do on my mat now. I'm absolutely fascinated with how I now sequence my practice and play on my mat, although I thought I had everything down years and years ago!!! This teaches me to not hold on to what I'm doing now, but be open to how things will change in my life and on my mat in the years to come. I'll still be on my mat, and I know it will be different, but I have a feeling that I will be amazed with new discoveries, as much and even more so than I am now.

So as the winter brings this year to a close, I salute and welcome the future.....no matter what it holds....the good and the bad.....for it is all one big lesson on how to BE.....not do.  Just open your heart and BE.

Thank you for another amazing year of sharing life together.
Namaste,
Trish